The Correspondence between the Heart and the Brain (Part One)

Dear Cardiac Muscle,

There you go again. You never learned.

I told you so many times not to open up your heart but you did the inevitable. Now it’s all cut up and we will be having a hard time sewing you back again.

I told you to be careful and be guarded, but you responded in a confident tone that you are the strongest muscle and you can take any beating, wearing and tearing being brought upon you.

Unfortunately you are wrong. You might be the strongest muscle of them all but you forgot you are the most vulnerable too. Now I could see you are full of pain, anguish and exhaustion.

See? You are hurting and it kills me to see you like that.

I hate you for not being protective of yourself and of me. Now I’m stuck with bittersweet memories. Thanks to you whenever I’m alone, those memories will replay all over and over again.

When will you learn to be cold? When will you learn not to value everything? When will you learn not to feel that much? When will you learn to become tired of everything? Or simply, when will you ever learn?

But I guess you will never be. You will continue to cherish and open up your heart despite the risks. In a way, I admire you for that because you have the bravery to repeatedly do those things whereas I just choose to repress it, runaway, forget it and move on. Well, I just wish you the best in your continuous march towards your happiness.

Sorry if I keep on being a bit harsh to you. It’s just that I want you to stop caring that much cause you might be in the losing end.

But then again, you will never be me and I will never be you. I can’t force you to follow my whims. Because like what you said, you will continue beating no matter what.

So just keep on beating my friend with optimism.

Just keep on beating.

Sincerely yours,

Cerebrum

Those Days…

We all had those days.

Days when we are abruptly taken out of our routine of our daily lives. Days when we are shaken to the core till we are in peril of being shattered. Days where we have to face a reality of pain, loss and fear.  Days when we had to conquer our inner demons not knowing  the aftermath it will bring us. These are the emotions we go into when we have to go through those days—the days where we have to see how precious yet fragile mortality is.

We all have countless experiences wherein we have to deal with the dreaded grim reaper. In our lifetime we have lost a number of relatives, friends, acquaintances and icons that somehow grip us with sorrow and shock of losing someone. I have dealt with a lot of these as well. I’ve lost relatives, childhood friend, classmate, colleagues and mentors. I’ve gone through the phase of denial, grief and the hardest of it all, acceptance. Throughout all of these, I would suddenly have these inner thoughts of how life is feeble but once I got into the phase of moving on, I forget it.

Then yesterday came. I learned that my friend has a serious illness and things got worse because he is now faced with the dilemma of undergoing an aggressive treatment that could help with his recovery but can also destroy and kill him. I was shocked and a sudden wave of sadness rushed in me. It was so surreal that my friend at the ripe time of his age, a guy that can still chase his dreams is in the brink of losing his life at an early age.

I can’t help but feel for him. Maybe because it’s the counselor side of me taking over but empathy starts kicking in. I felt his pain, I felt his fear. I tried my best to encourage him and helped him face this trying moment of his life but at the back of my head, I was at a loss. I was still trying to grasp the concept of how it shakes you up when someone’s life is put into jeopardy, but I never I would be this shaken. I never knew this come to me that close. Way, way close.

My mind is clouded up to now with confused thoughts and mixed emotions. I still feel that I’m walking in zone of endless nothingness, trying to hope that it will be a happy ending after all. However, despite the fact that I cannot guarantee that it will happen, and being in that foggy state, I can see some specks of light that somehow will lead me to seek the answers of why these things of sickness and death haunt us.

That recent incident with my friend made me see a clearer way on how to portray life. We might be young and full of vigor to chase our dreams, but in a snap, it could be easily taken away from us. We might be complaining that we don’t have the material stuff we wanted but there are some who are not even able to get their basic needs. We might be depressed because we are not living the life we dreamed of but there are some who are simply dreaming of extra more life. We might be taking for granted the simple beautiful days when there are those who long for it. The ironies of living our life could go on and on.

It’s up to us how to shuffle through all the darkness of death and all his friends for us to see the light that will give us ideas on how to live lives fully and guide us somehow to determine the real purpose of our lives. Believe me it will be not that easy considering the emotional baggage it brings but hey, it’s worth trying. All of these things somehow made me determine maybe 50% of my purpose and it is to provide comfort and encouraging things whether in the form of speaking, writing or just mere listening. It may not be that big but I know it will make things a little bit better.

Those days. We all fear it because we are forced to re-examine our lives, of what we have become and what lies upon us but we have to recognize how death and sickness bittersweetly make us realize that life is too precious to be wasted, too beautiful not to be cherished, too meaningful not to have a purpose and too exciting not to be lived.

the “x” diaries

If you think this entry is about my past love affairs, I am sorry this is not.

My apologies if I had fooled you but this is more on the “X” that I loved ever since my childhood days, the X-Men. Blame it on X-Men First Class.

Last Monday, I watched the highly anticipated X-Men: First Class, and what can I say? I was like transported to my childhood days of being amazed and excited with the fight scenes, being emotionally affected by their back stories and being  envious of their mutant powers. And within two hours, they brought back the X-Men geek in me.

I had the X side-effects: I began reading again net articles about them, watched the original cartoon series in Youtube and I even made my own set of mutant teams! Yes, I am that of a fan!

Meet the “EXES”:

 

 

 

TOUCHE

Powers: Has the ability to absorb and imitate the molecular composition of what he touches and use it for defense and attacks. He also has the ability to absorb energy with his hands and transfer it to his sword to cause massive damage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ARCHER

Powers: Proficient in archery, she has the ability to hit targets from a far distance.  She can also create plasma arrows by transferring her energy force to her bows which can disintegrate objects, create injuries and temporarily paralyze enemies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GRANITE

 Powers: Has the ability to convert his body into stone which gives him super strength, durability and force. He can create tectonic movements  and can control rocks for his defense.

 

 

 

 

 

 

SPHINX

 Powers: Her skin is covered with scales which give her agility and protection from blasts and other energy attacks. She also small claws that can emit venom to immobilize her opponents. Her heightened senses which give her tremendous capability to assess and adapt to the environment she is in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

BLADE

 Powers: Has animal like abilities of speed, healing, agility, reflexes stamina and strength. He also can create retractable claws from his bones which can slice and cut through objects.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ANGELA

 Powers: Has angel-like wings that give her the ability of flight. She also has the ability of hypnotic suggestions, creating illusions and create alternative realities. Her wings also give her the power of healing herself and others from damages and injuries.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

KINETIC

 Powers: Can create various heat energy in his hands which he can use as blasts, fields and bombs. The heat energy also gives him the force to propel in the air gaining him flight and energy shields.

 

 

 

 

 

JANIN

 Powers: A trained ninja, she has the ability of speed, dexterity and stealth. She also has the ability to control shadows and use it to blind, attack or hide. She is an expert in hand skills and always has a wooden stick which she uses in fighting. She also uses the stick to emit her shadow energies which can temporary create hysteria to anyone who had a contact with it.

 

 

 

 

So they are my dream team of mutants.

If there is one thing X-Men gave us it is the desire to have mutant powers. We all want to have special abilities, be it strength, intelligence, weather control, optic blasts, psionic blades, flight, telekenesis and whatever our minds wish for. Sadly it’s just mere fiction and we just have to rely with our imagination.

However, if we look beyond the fictional powers, we can see that mutants are just like us. We all want to be accepted, we all wanted to belong and we wanted to be treated fairly no matter what we look, act and think.

And with this superficial world we are in, we are mutants in our own special way, struggling for acceptance and tolerance and just like them, we just have to keep on fighting.

 

(Note: If you want to create your own mutants, try visiting this site: http://marvel.com/games/play/31/create_your_own_superhero

and if you want to further enhance the X-Men geek in you, you’re in for a treat with this website: http://www.uncannyxmen.net/)

 

 

 

 

An Open Letter through a Song

 

I always have adored Pink. Her kick ass songs about love, life, loss, acceptance never fails to impress and inspire me. Lately, I was able to hear her 2006 song, Dear Mr. President. It is an open-letter addressed to ex-President Bush and his ways as the US president. Immediately, I felt a connection with the song. The lyrics are compelling and haunting.

Just like her, I have so many question to our leaders (may it be ex-PGMA or PNOY). There are still lots of unresolved issues and problems in our country and as I grow older, things have been the same-corruption, poverty,crimes, inequality–and there are just some slight and actual development.

This song clearly expresses how us, the commoners feel against our leaders. It asks the questions we have been wanting to ask and have a clear answer from them. It voices out our concerns as citizens and how our rights should be protected and promoted.

Watch and be moved by the song’s power:

 

And here are the song’s lyrics:

Dear Mr. President, come take a walk with me
(Take a walk with me)
Let’s pretend we’re just two people and you’re not better than me
I’d like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly

What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street?
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep?
What do you feel when you look in the mirror? Are you proud?

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye? And tell me why?

Dear Mr.President, were you a lonely boy?
(Were you a lonely boy?)
Are you a lonely boy?
(Are you a lonely boy?)

How can you say, no child is left behind?
We’re not dumb and we’re not blind
(We’re not blind)
They’re all sitting in your cells while you pave the road to hell

What kind of father would take his own daughter’s rights away?
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay?
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You’ve come a long way from whiskey and cocaine

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye?

Let me tell you ’bout hard work
Minimum wage with a baby on the way
Let me tell you ’bout hard work
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took them away

Let me tell you ’bout hard work
Building a bed out of a cardboard box
Let me tell you ’bout hard work, hard work, hard work
You don’t know nothin’ ’bout hard work, hard work, hard work

How do you sleep at night?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Dear Mr. President, you’d never take a walk with me, would you?

 

Now I just hope that PNOY can listen to this, given his inclination to music….

 

Baguio’s Best Shots

Had a short get-away in Baguio with my colleagues… As usual, I was inspired by the views, scenery, greenery and foods…so the photographer in me came out….

In fact, i took more pictures of Baguio scenes rather than myself and my friends…

Hope you’ll be inspired by Baguio’s captured beauty…

here’s the slide show:

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and here is the gallery:

of unlikely friendships and tearjerkers

friendships. we all have it. we all treasure it.

it said that friends are the family that we choose for ourselves because we know that they are the ones who truly understand us because of the common bond we have with them.

lots of friendships have been portrayed over the years in films. some are touching and some are downright annoying. so i would say that im not the type of who will watch sentimental films about friendships because it’s kinda cheesy for me and i don’t weep that easily.

however, these are the friendships films that really touched me deeply. made me unexpectedly cry a bucket of tears. and had me reeling with bittersweet feelings after a few days of watching it.

ironically, these films are not the usual “my friend is a human being friend”. but explored the friendships that extend over humanity, in the form of animals and other inanimate stuff.

Here are they:

1. Toy Story 3

this this film ranks in one of my all time favorite films. i liked this film so much i even posted a blog entry about this.

2. Hachiko

i find films about dogs corny (except for beethoven and 101 dalmatians) but this is different. it is based from a true story in Japan way,way back the early 1930s and it tells the story of unwavering loyalty of a dog to his master. loyalty to the point of  he can put our BFFs into shame. oh how  i wish, we all have these hachis in our lives.

3. Charlotte’s Web

five things i enjoyed about these film: 1.wilbur is the new babe. 2. big spiders are not that really scary. 3. all star cast. 4. love sara mclachlan’s ordinary miracle. 5. i just love the film

4. Wonangsori (Old Partner)

i just happened to watch this film recently. it is a korean documentary film about the strong bond of a farmer and his ox that lasted for forty years. with its simplicity, it really tugged my heart for days and days and days.

i suggest you watch all these films. it had it given perspective about valuing friendship, treasuring loyalty and keeping the faith in our friends. yeah, they maybe a bit bittersweet, but the sweetness will eventually overpower that tinge of sadness.

The Top Ten Life Lessons Worth Learning

10-10-10

10-10-10.

People have been saying that this is a lucky day since this only happens once in a millenia. No wonder lots of events are being held this very moment, cause this triple threat of numbers might serve as a charms for destiny to shower us with luck.

Now, if there’s one thing 10-10-10 had brought me, it’s the inspiration of creating this entry about the top ten life lessons that had helped me throughout the years: the ones that had helped me in facing my day, in surviving life’s challenges and in cultivating the maturity I thought I never have.

I would not claim and preach that you follow all of this because this might not be effective for all but these might be worth considering:

1) Cliche as it may sound, believe in destiny. Things happen for a reason, whether good or bad. We tend to question why such things happen to us, but have we ever asked, “why not?“.

2) Try to save money. Always save up at least 5%-7% of your salary and work around the remaining amount for all of your expenses. I swear this has been effective in helping me become frugal without the hassles.

3) It never fails to unwind with your colleagues after a weeklong workload. Trust me, it is a good stress buster. Whether a night out, eat out, videoke nights or lasertag, having your own social support at work helps you to survive the pressures from your work.

4) Though we are already settled in a certain profession, it doesn’t mean that you do not have the rights to pursue your avocations and passions in life. Being in a box up world of job descriptions should not stop you from pursuing your “other” interests in life. I am a counselor by profession, but I still pursue my love for cooking by joining culinary competitions and my passion for writing by blogging.

5) Always keep the virtue of goodwill and sharing alive. Share goodness and compassion among the people and the animals around you and the environment. even those who have hurt you! It brings that extra feeling of satisfaction in your life. Make someone smile. Donate blood. It’s up to you on how to make the world a better place in your own little way.

6) Remember and reminisce the past. You’ll never know how those nostalgic feelings would put a smile not just on you but the people around you.  Share stories and memories from the past. It is a good way of collectively gathering fun and happy experiences. The perfect sample? The #sentisabado sensation that rocked the whole twitter world by storm a month ago.

7) True friendship or other relationships cannot be established by a social networking site. There are bonds and interactions in life that tagging nor linking nor following can’t do.  Met someone over the net? Don’t get excited that much for it might lead you to heartbreaks and loss. The best way of building and maintaining a relationship is the face-to-face conversations. It makes you feel more secure and warmth than the networking site.

8) Expectation can be as tempting as an opportunity or as devastating as a failure. What to do? Just be wise and keen in handling one to avoid being pulled in the emotional drain in the future. Do not expect too much. The more you expect, the more chances you might feel hurt and get disappointed when things don’t go your way. Just take it slow.

9) The true essence of forgiveness is not by forgetting and later on blame the people who have wronged you and despise them for creating the emotional wreck you had become before but instead, thanking them  for the strength they had instilled in you.  I know it is hard not to hate someone but at the end of day, you will realize that yes, they might have hurt you before but the also had contributed n making you a stronger and better person.

10) Despite experiencing sufferings, hurt and heartbreaks, and being a victim of life’s bitchy ways, never dwell on self-pity. You are lowering yourself to others which makes you be unfair yo yourself. Despite the dramas we meet in life it is better to keep our head held up high, put on a smile and battle them face on rather than just quit and cry about it. It is okay to cry for a bit but NOT to the point that you think you are the victim of the world and you needed to be saved. Come on, we are our OWN heroes in this world and is up to us on how to overcome those hardships in life.

We are a work in progress. Everyday, we learn lessons from the world’s greatest course–life and classroom–our world.

We gain insights from the greatest teacher of it all–experience.

And most of all, wisdom is achieved by life’s day to day students which is, US.

But we have to remember that it is up to us if we are going to use the learnings that we have for our own advantage.

So what’s your top ten?

Dear Dean Lorraine

Dearest Dean Lorraine Villanueva, we miss you. Thank you for everything.

Dear Dean Lorraine,

I still remember that day—March 3, 2008.

It was my first day at a new job and I was sitting on the couch, anticipating the things that would happen on this new work of mine. Then I saw you approaching me and I couldn’t help but notice  your beauty and elegance shining through that grey corporate ensemble that you were wearing.

Your serene aura calmed my jittery nerves and the moment you started talking to me, all my remaining nervousness and anxious thoughts gradually faded away. I could not explain how or why it disappeared but maybe it is because of your soothing voice or your elegant expression or maybe your motherly stance.  There was no clear answer in my head at that time but I was able to know your name. You were Dean Lorraine Villanueva.

As days passed by, I began to know you better. I was able to learn about your life, your works and your experiences. These three words best explain it all: Careerwoman, Educator and Mother.

As a careerwoman, you have various accolades, achievements and accomplishments in your career. Throughout the years, you have been involved in sharing your expertise and knowledge in the Hotel and Service Industry by becoming an educator in UP Diliman, providing lectures, seminars, training programs and consulting engagements around the Philippines.  You also have allocated some of your time in occupying various positions in different organizations in the Philippines such as a board member post in the Philippine Women’s Association, a UP College of Home Economics Secretary post and the most prestigious of it all, becoming the President of the Council of Hotel and Restaurant Educations of the Philippines (COHREP). COHREP is an organization that is committed in developing and improving the Hotel and Restaurant education in our country and you were at its helm for two years.  Your latest career milestone was you became the Founding Dean of Enderun College, an educational institution that offers international hospitality management and business administration courses.

Despite all these glories, you were still able to continue your educational pursuits. You finished a MBA degree and a PhD in Communication in the University of the Philippines in 1982 and 2008 respectively. This reflects how you give importance to education—that no matter, how many awards or success a person receives during his professional life, the continuous quest for educational formation should not stop after we received a bachelor’s degree.

This leads me in your second quality, the Educator. During the times that I was with you, I have seen how passionate you are in educating the future hoteliers and restaurateurs. Your thirty-one years in the Academe is a proof of your dedication as an educator. From 1978 to 2006, you taught in both graduate and undergraduate classes of the University of the Philippines. You then went to Enderun Colleges and became its dean. You were there during the early stage of Enderun and with your guidance as its academic head, you were able to accomplish lots of great things within three years! With your leadership, Enderun was able to get its Commission of Higher Education (CHED) accreditation in just two years after it was established. You were also instrumental in developing its curriculum and recruiting some of its educators, ensuring that the students will receive the utmost learning they need.

You were the driving force behind the academic success of the school. Together with a small team, you faced countless pressure, stresses and challenges in order for Enderun to become a formidable management school and you triumphed over those hindrances. Who would have thought that beneath the calm demeanor there was this strong-willed woman who stirred the ship into its goal.

Despite becoming being a dean, you never forgot your love for teaching. You still taught in Enderun. You were respected by your students for sharing your knowledge about the hotel management industry and they cherished the way you teach because your approach was different. You were warm yet unyielding, considerate yet prudent. You were their teacher yet you became more of a mother to them.

And this leads me to your best quality, being “the” mother. If there was one thing that binds both of the employees and students on what we really admire about you is your motherly approach. There are lots of personality traits out there to select from but this encompasses all the qualities we have seen from you. You were a friend, mentor, confidante, counselor, inspiration, protector, supporter and motivator rolled into one. That is why we cannot help but identify you as Enderun’s mother figure because we see those qualities with our own moms.

You were the mother of Enderun from the students to its employees. Though technically, you only have three beautiful children, we were sort of the self-proclaimed adopted ones and we count for more than a thousand! But you did not mind it and instead welcomed us with open arms, and boy, did we savor those privilege. In fact, we fondly call you Mommy Dean.

That is why you became endearing to us. You were different among the usual supervisors and heads.   You are humble, accommodating and nurturing. You were the breath of fresh air in a work riddled with day-to-day challenges, stress and pressure. Seeing your smile or just simply hearing your oh-so soothing voice is enough for us to get on going for the rest of the day. You also have those moments where in we see how unassuming and humorous you are. There was a time you helped pushed a stalled van and just laughed about it. You were relatable and we loved you for it.

But what made us treasure you the most is your tireless effort of believing in each and everyone of us. You put faith on our abilities, believed in our talents and encouraged us to never stop pursuing our dreams. May it be a student or an employee, you were always there to guide us and support us in your own little way.  You made us believed in ourselves even more and be motivated to pursue our aspirations no matter how difficult it is. And we will forever be grateful for that.

I thought those feelings will continue for years but it all changed during that fateful month of May. You told us you would take a leave of absence and would be back by June or September. Like kids being left alone on a rainy night, we anxiously waited for your return, but as fate would have it, God had other plans.

Fast forward to the month of September and we found ourselves like zombies. Staring vaguely in the air, walking with heaviness in our hearts, we felt incomplete. We tried to figure it out until we painfully realized that the woman who brings the fresh air, the lady who has the inspiring smile and mother who radiates with the guiding light was already gone.

And it hit us. We would not be seeing our second mother. We would not be hearing that gentle laugh and calming voice. We would not be able to feel your reassuring embrace. There would be no words of wisdom for us to ponder on. We felt orphaned.

The feeling of loss is heartbreaking but we comforted each other by celebrating your legacy, the numerous simple ways on how you have touched and inspired countless lives. Those helped us to gradually accept your passing.

I wrote this letter as homage to you and for what you have done. This is my way to show the world that you might not be the popular politician, the celebrated social worker nor the patriotic achiever but you changed my life and everyone else around you, and that is enough for me to say that you deserved to be recognized.

I still remember that day—September 20, 2009. It’s the day you said goodbye to your family, friends, colleagues, students and to everyone you love and love you back.  It’s the day we felt the utmost sadness yet, we are comforted by the thought that you are now in a place reserved for the very best of us.

Yes, I remember that day. The pain, the tears, the fears and the emptiness I felt with your passing. But somehow, I was still able to put a smile on my face because I surely know that it is also the day heaven gained a new angel.

One of your adopted sons,

Mark Ibo

(Postscript: This article is an entry that I submitted in a journalism contest way back last May. Though I wasnt able to win, I’m still proud that I made this and in commemoration of Dean’s passing, it is fitting for me to share this to everyone who loves and cherishes her. Cheers Dean Lorraine! You will be forever loved by us! )



Bloody Heck!

Majority of the people in this world tend to dislike towards blood. Some would faint, some would vomit, some would hyperventilate just the plain sight of it. I’m an exception of that fact.

I have lots of bloody encounter, no pun intended, as I grow up. I once got my fingers cut when it was stuck on a broken window. I had a series of lancets poking me when I had H-fever (it’s now known as dengue). I clumsily cut myself during a “hostage-taking” role play during our biology class. I even had proven the truth behind the idiomatic expression, stone throw, when I accidentally hit my playmate with a sharp stone in his forehead.  And due to my impulsive mind, I donated blood for red-cross when I was in college.

My latest bloody encounter was two weeks ago, when I rushed to the side of a friend dear to my heart (clue: he’s often included in some of the entries in my blog) when he asked for helped because his sister needs blood donors due to dengue. To cut the story short, I got my blood tested, I passed and I could be a donor again (yey for me!) and oh, his sister recovered without any blood transfusion at all.

Not all of us have the guts to donate blood. Some would be shaken with just the sight of long needles pricking your veins. But believe me, the pain is nothing compared to the benefits you’ll reap from it.

I wrote this not to convince people to donate blood, but maybe, just to consider it as an option in the future. Why? Here are the reasons:

1. there MIGHT be some freebies – yes, for all the cheapskate out there, some organizations would give free gifts like shirt, sticker, poster and foods as a token of your generosity. shame on me, because that was my primary reason when i first shared blood. i got tempted by the free stuff. oh well granted, i was still quite immature then…which leads me to the second reason,

2. humanity– goodwill and all, donating one’s blood is one act of selflessness. an ounce of blood might save someone’s life from danger. it can also heal wounds that can’t be healed by betadine or any gauze. I’m talking about wounds created by conflicts and heartbreaks. you see, this special friend of mine were involved in an argument way, way back and i was afraid that our budding friendship will be forgotten. and when i learned that he need donors, i immediately volunteered. i was so tempted to get even at him by not showing up, but humanity prevailed and decided to take the higher road…it then lead to reconcilatory bond…see? blood can also bond…(plus points to the rhyme)

3. it will show how healthy you are – it has been five years since i donated blood and if i remember it right, my lifestyle had a complete 180 degrees turn after it…i was no more the good boy and though i was tempted to donate blood again before, i was scared because it might confirm my hypochondriac fears that i might discover that i have an incurable disease after the blood screening, that was why im avoiding it. but blood donation requires you to screen your blood first of all the known diseases out there like hepatitis, HIV and allergy. and if you passed, that means you are free from those threats..and since i wrote this, i guess you’d know what were my results..

4. it can conquer your fears. this will be your own fear factor. we all know that some avoid this because they are afraid of blood, afraid of needles or maybe they are afraid of the confirmation of their fears (please refer to item no 3). i had this attitude before of finding security of not knowing because sometimes truth is more hurtful than a wound. but cliché as it may seem, truth will indeed set you free. there was a time that i was avoiding to donate blood again because it might be the confirmation of my fears that i am sick. Undergoing this donation process again forced me to face it, and imagine my relief that i am healthy, just a hypochondriac.

5. it is GOOD for you. need to say more? it’s good for your body…i remember i was told that donating blood is good for our system because it will replenish our blood. it’s like our internal organs would have a car wash of some sort…and we all need that once in a while…

i hope these reasons are good enough for you to somehow consider donating blood.

you just have to remember that for a few minutes of pain, it will yield a life time of goodness.

so let that blood start flowing..

The Kitten Who Can’t Be Moved

This story is not about me. 

For the first time in my blogging life, I’m putting aside my self-centered views about life, love and culture. Instead, I’m giving this limelight to feature someone who made an impact to me,  in just a few hours of seeing his plight. Meet the kitten who can’t be moved. 

Kitty Who Can't be Moved

and when zoomed, 

Kitty who can't be moved (zoomed version)

I saw this kitten last Saturday afternoon. I was waiting at the corner of our subdivision, waiting for my choirmates to pick me up (because we have a chorale practice in Buendia at 1 PM), when all of a sudden, I heard a kitten meowing. I looked back and I saw him but I didn’t mind him at first because I thought he was just looking for his mother. A few minutes had passed and his meows became louder and louder, and when I looked back, I saw him moving in a weird way and that made me curious to go closer and checked him up. Instantly, my heart sank on what I saw. 

I saw that from his waist down to his hind legs was paralyzed or in Tagalog, lantang gulay. It was immobile and he was just literally dragging himself so he can move. I could see the pain the kitten feels and how he was valiant in his efforts for him to “walk”. 

As instinct would have told it, he went to a generator cage, probably so he can seek shelter for protection from the elements, animals and people that would bring him potential harm. The problem was that the entrance to the cage was quite small so he really has to forced himself to go inside and since he couldn’t use force from his hind legs, he was trapped in the entrance and that made him cry with pain. At the back of my mind, I said, what if i get him now and pull him back and bring him to our house. But because my choirmates would pass by any time and even my hand couldn’t fir in the opening, the best thing that I did for him was to just gently push him inside the cage. When he was safely inside, my choirmates arrived in time and we were off to the practice. 

However, I wasn’t able to really have fun and concentrate during the travel and practice because all the time I was thinking about the hapless kitten and his probable fate. Even my choirmates were mystified with my silence and when I explained to the them the reason, they had this “awww” then just went on with their conversations. But I was stucked with the feeling of pity for the kitten. 

That’s why i concocted a plan on how to “rescue” the kitten. I texted, tweeted and called my friends to ask for their help in giving me the number of Philippine Animal Welfare Society (PAWS) a few responded that’s why instead of going with my choirmates to hang out after our practice, I decided to flaked out to help the kitten on my own. 

I went home immediately and checked the cage to see if he is stil alive. I mimicked his meows and luckily, he was still there. So rushed home, searched for the number of PAWS and called them up. Unfortunately, they were busy in handling an abuse case, but they told me I can temporaily help him. 

Witht that suggestion, I devised a plan: since the cage was padlocked,the best thing that i can do is to feed the kitten, give him water and make sure he would be safe until Monday. Come Monday, I would talk to the guard of the building and use my charms for him to open the cage and for me to get the cat. After that, I would take the kitten, take care of him and give him to PAWS on Saturday for his complete recovery. 

I was so motivated and I was willing to put up the fight eventhough my friends and some of my family members thought I’ve already gone to the cucckoodom. 

I pushed through with my plans, bought andsmuggled some Whiskas; brought water and put it inside the cage. Since he was still afraid, I let him be. I returned for a few minutes and was so glad that he was chomping some of it, so I thought my plan was running smoothly. But again, life has some twists in it. 

I left him,  confident that he would make it through the night. I went to another choir practice and right after, I went home to check the kitten. Unfortunately, there was no meows. It was just like what the night was. Dead silent. I tried meowing, but I got no response. I was meowing and scooping like crazy just to checked if he’s still there. 

But he wasn’t there. I was still hopeful that maybe he was just sleeping and would probably be awake by Sunday morning. I even prayed to God and asked  for his intercession, because as what I promised, I’d do what it takes for that kitten to make sure he’s alive. 

Sunday morning came, but he wasn’t there. Till noon. Till the evening. 

Till now. 

It is still a mystery to me on what was his real fate. He might have died becaus of the extent of his injuries or looking on the brighter side, he was able to get out and went somewhere else. He just faded to obscurity so what will remain are just questions. 

It has been a while since I took care of an animal this intense. The last time was when I was  in my teens, where I took care of chickens (I even named them ChickBi- ChickenBird and Laqua- Lakwastera). Maybe because I had two previous experiences of witnessing kittens being ran over to death. So probably, I unconciously promised myself that I would help out kittens who suffered the same fate. 

To you kitty, I am sorry I wasn’t able to save you on time. I am sorry that I did not get you immediately and you weren’t able simply to have THAT chance . I am sorry that I acted too human I forgot being humane. I’m sorry that I acted so selfishly in my own human world, I forgot you also needed to fight for survival. I’m sorry but I know I did what I could to provide you that chance of survival. Wherever you are, thank you for inspiring me to become an advocate of reminding people (esp those who are driving) about being wary on stray cats and dogs. Because, indeed they have lives too. 

People reading this might think I’m crazy about these small stray creatures. But we have to remember, unlike us, they do no have the voices to speak up for themselves. Unlike us, they do not have that much of a strength to ward off the different hazards surrounding them. Unlike us, they do not have the shelter we run to if trouble is lurking. 

So please, next time you drive a car or pass by a street and saw them,  be considerate enough to do your own little way to make them feel safe. 

That’s one way of making this world a better place and their world as well.